Rock Climbing Jokes

Here is a compilation of humorous rock climbing jokes. There are several climbing climber jokes that no one knows and that will make you laugh out loud.

Read the puns and riddles that offer a question and then reveal solutions, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you find these rock climbing jokes amusing enough to tell others.

Find more on cruxcrush, and check out an amazing destination for climbing.

1. The funniest blonde joke ever

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond rush away from a burning building.

Ascending to the roof The firefighters are down on the street.

I am holding a blanket ready for them to jump into.

The firefighters shout at the brunette, “Jump, jump, jump! It’s your only option.

chance to live! “

SWISH! The brunette leaps! The firefighters yank the blanket.

away. Like a tomato, the brunette smacks onto the sidewalk.

“C’mon! Jump! ‘You’ve got to leap!’ exclaim the firemen to the redhead.

“Oh my goodness! “You’re going to take the blanket!” “said the brunette.

“No! We can’t stand brunettes! We don’t mind redheads! “

“OK,” the redhead says, jumping.SWISH! The firefighter yanks the

The blanket is removed, and the lady is crushed like a pancake on the sidewalk.

 Only the blonde remains on the building’s roof. Once again, the

scream at the firefighters, “Jump! You must leap!”

“Not at all! You’re simply going to yank the cover away! “The blonde shouted.

“No? You must leap! We will not remove the blanket! “

“Take a look,” the blonde adds, “Nothing you say will persuade me.”

I know that you’re not going to yank the blanket away from me! So, what do I want from you?

What you should do is lay the blanket down and step back…

2. A demon appears to possess a daughter…

Her mother phones their priest in a panic, asking for an exorcism. “She has been whirling around madly, climbing on the walls, running on the ceiling… moving about non-stop!” she says. The priest responds, “I’m not sure what you want me to do.” She appears to be getting lots of exercises! “

3. Two drunk people are crawling on the train.

“I’m tired of ascending this ladder; when will our floor be ready?” says one.

 “Don’t worry, I see an elevator approaching.”

4. The other day, I was driving by the jail…

with one of my friends. Suddenly, he begins yelling and pointing, ‘LOOK! There’s a midget on the loose! He’s climbed over the wall and is now descending! ‘

 I slammed on the brakes. You can’t say midget because it’s too condescending.’

5. (NSFW) Schoolyard Jokes

Maria returned home triumphant, telling her mother how she had gained $20 from those idiot lads just by climbing a tree.

“Maria, they merely wanted to see your pants!” her mother said. Maria giggled and added, “I know, mum; that’s why I took them off first.”

“So, do you want me to climb up with my own hands or may I use a climbing device?”

The latter is correct.

6. Just having fun

‘Yo, I’m the greatest at climbing and swinging!’ says one orangutan to another orangutan.

His pal glances at him and says, “That’s a gibbon.”

7. A man was trapped inside a burning structure…

… on the twelfth floor. He dashed to the open window, where he noticed a firefighter arriving on a tall ladder. He was overjoyed to have been saved. He called to the firemen before leaping out the window,

“How should I proceed?” Should I go down the ladder with you, or should I jump to the ground?”

“‘The ladder,’ answered the firefighter.

The man passed away.

8. A guy was detained…

 after repeatedly going up and headbutting Big Ben…

Police are unable to identify the culprit, although his face is recognized.

9. A collection of dwarf and midget jokes apologize.

Did you realize that America has a dwarf shortage?

Dwarfism is becoming more prevalent in other nations.

Dwarves and midgets have almost nothing in common.

Did you know that six out of seven dwarves are unhappy?

I observed a dwarf prisoner descending the jail wall the other day, and he scoffed at me. “Well, that’s a touch patronizing,” I remarked.

How can midgets entice women to date them? They’re fantastic at small talk.

10. A rabbi and a priest had a picnic.

A Rabbi and a priest were having a picnic on a scorching summer day and wanted to cool down in the river. They had forgotten to pack bathing suits, so they skinny-dipped instead.

The river was swiftly running, and both clerics were washed a short way downstream before being rescued. They had just begun to dash it after getting out of the river to get to their clothing when numerous members of their flock came into view.

The priest launched himself at a spurt of speed while covering his privates with his hands, but the Rabbi covered his face instead. “What are you doing?” inquired the priest. “I’m not sure about you,” the Rabbi said, “but my congregation recognizes me by my face.”

11. A man walks by a prison…

… until he notices a dwarf climbing out of one of the prison’s upper cells. When the midget turns around and sees the man on the street, he is going down a rope. The midget flips off the men and climbs down the rope. “Wow, that’s a little patronizing,” the man muses.

12. I used to be a bed salesman.

This guy came in one day and started jumping into the beds and asking very precise questions. Then it dawned on me: he was an undercover officer.

13. What do you call a cow that goes rock climbing?

A high-steak scenario

14. I noticed a runaway dwarf scrambling over a chain-link fence.

 He glared, stuck his tongue out at me, and raced away as he climbed down the other side.

“That was a touch patronizing,” I thought to myself.

15. My father…

..invited me to join him on a mountain climbing vacation in Nepal.

“Sher, dad,” I said.

16. When fasting…

Gandhi would squeeze garlic into his mouth and go barefoot up mountains to meditate. This helped him feel less hungry.

mystic with additional halitosis who is extremely calloused and frail.

17. A panda enters a bar…

He downs some beer nuts before pulling out a pistol, shooting it in the air, and fleeing via the front door. “Hey!” exclaims the bartender, and the panda responds. “I’m a panda, Google me,” and “panda: a tree-climbing animal with striking black and white coloration” appeared. ‘Drinks shoots and leaves.’

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